Two years ago, when she was 12, my daughter was diagnosed as having ADD-Inattentive Type and Depression.  My first response was, "Not MY child!  I did everything right - read lots of books about pregnancy and parenting.  How could THIS have happened?!"  Truth be told, up until that point - the moment when the phrase "Inattentive Type" came out of the Psychiatrist's mouth - I just really thought it was ME!  "Maybe I'm just not as good a parent as I thought!"

What took us to the doctor in the first place unfolded at my sister's wedding.  I noticed my daughter had cuts on her knuckles.  When I looked closer, I noticed they were letters, one on each knuckle, spelling out a boy's name - the boy who was "breaking her heart" at the time (now referred to as "The Turd").  My daughter had some friends who were "into cutting", and "taught her" how to do it.  After months and months of having her lock herself in her room, barely speaking to anyone in the family, and watching her grades go from A's to C's, this was the event that compelled me to get help.  "This is not something I know how to handle by myself."

I blamed myself for a long time, especially since the times when she cut herself were usually after she and I had had a fight about something - not cleaning her room, not turning in a homework assignment, not giving up on a boy who was bad news.  Once I learned more about the "Inattentive Type" of ADD, Depression, and Cutting, things made a little more sense, but that didn't make life any easier.  Want to know what did?  Medication.

I never wanted to have a child who "had to be medicated."  "I've seen THOSE kids.  MY kid isn't going to be one of THEM."  (Please accept my apology, all you Moms of THOSE WONDERFUL AND MISUNDERSTOOD KIDS!!  I know better NOW!)  The Psychiatrist asked me to trust him, and I thank God every day that I did.  We saw changes in my daughter within a few weeks.  She didn't seem miserable 24/7 (I still wouldn't describe her as "happy all the time," but at least I don't worry she will hurt herself when she's behind her closed door!).  Her friends noticed the difference, too.  And she said she "felt" better.

Eventually, she got rid of "The Turd," started spending more time with her friends, and over the past two years has had increases to her Prozac, Strattera, and Adderall.  Life is alot better than it was, but we have our struggles every day.  It is so hard to tell where the "disorder" ends and "being a teenager" begins. At the end of the last school year, I took my daughter to a "Moms and Daughters Night" at her school.  She immediately left me and went off with her friends, while I attended the "Just for Moms" session.  The Moms in that room joked about things they do with their daughters, how they get them to "open up," how they talk to them about boys, and drugs, and sex.  I couldn't relate to ANY of them.  They don't have the first clue what life is like with a child who has Inattentive Type ADD.  That's what this blog is about.

At work, I'm the one that people seek out when there are problems, and can usually come up with some ways to solve them.  I think I'm an intelligent person (though there are plenty of people who would argue that, I guess).  Raising my teenage daughter without going nuts?  Solving that problem requires simply taking one day at a time!!!  To keep my sanity, or maybe to make YOU feel better about what's going on in YOUR house, I'm going to share here.  "Welcome to the jungle!"